WE 'SCRIPTURE-KNOWLEDGE SHARKS'

   I have always delighted in the scene (Tom Sawyer) where Twain has young Tom showing off his Biblical/Scriptural knowledge at the Sunday School "Memory Verse" contest (or whatnot) - -
"Can you name at least TWO of our Lord Jesus' Disciples...."
Tom thinks, grimaces, fulminates...and then the Spirit rewards him:
"DAVID AND GOLIATH !!!"     :)   [Watson's wildly free paraphrase]

  As I've always been a sucker for this kind of Holy Writ mirth and frivolity, I share with you a neat little scene from P.G. Wodehouse's delightful romp RIGHT HO, JEEVES - - -

The Headmaster is bringing his young grammar school boys up on to the stage to be awarded end-of-term awards.  Presenting the awards is a "drunk as a skunk" friend of Bertie Wooster, one Gussie Fink-Nottle.  Gussie is as I say, plastered.  Now Wodehouse  (Bertie Wooster is narrating):

"...paging G.G. Simmons.  A moment later the latter was up and coming, and conceive my emotion when it was announced that the subject on which he had clicked was Scripture knowledge.  One of us, I mean to say. 
   G.G. Simmons was an unpleasant, perky-looking stripling, mostly front teeth and spectacles, but I gave him a big hand. We Scripture-knowledge sharks stick together.
   Gussie, I was sorry to see, didn't like him...He was cold and distant.
   'Well, G.G. Simmons.'
   'Sir, yes, sir.'
   'What do you mean-sir, yes, sir?  Dashed silly thing to say.  So, you've won the Scripture-knowledge prize, have you?'
   'Sir, yes, sir.'
   'Yes,' said Gussie, 'you look just the sort of little tick who would.  And yet,'  he said, pausing and eyeing the child keenly, 'how are we to know that this has all been open and above board?  Let me test you, G.G. Simmons.  Who was What's-His-Name-the chap who begat Thingummy?  Can you answer me that Simmons?'
   'Sir, no, sir.'
   Gussie turned to the bearded bloke.
   'Fishy,' he said. 'Very fishy. The boy appears to be totally lacking in Scripture knowledge.'

P. G. Wodehouse, RIGHT HO,  JEEVES  copyright 1934, The Overlook Press edition, p. 210

   I think Gussie Fink-Nottle would make a great Headmaster at the WATSON School of Catechetical Legerdemain!

- frW